Here are some additional helpful ideas to think about as you go
through the "grief process":
1. Know you can survive. You may not think so, but you can.
2. Struggle with "why" it happended until you no longer need to
know "why" or until you are satisfied with partial answers.
3. Know you may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your feelings,
but all your feelings are normal.
4. Anger, guilt, confusion, forgetfulness are common responses. You
are not crazy -- you are in mourning.
5. Be aware you may feel appropriate anger at the person, at the
world, at God, at yourself.
6. You may feel guilty for what you think you did or did not do.
7. Having suicidal thoughts is common. It does not mean that you
will act on these thoughts.
8. Remember to take one moment or one day at a time.
9. Don't be afraid to cry. Tears are healing.
10. Give yourself time to heal.
11. Remember the choice was not yours. No one is the sole influence
in another's life.
12. Expect setbacks. Don't panic if emotions return like a tidal
wave. You may only be experiencing a remnant of grief, an unfinished
piece.
13. Try to put off major decisions.
14. Give yourself permission to get professional help.
15. Be aware of the pain of your family and friends.
16. Be patient with yourself and with others who may not understand.
17. Steer clear of people who want to tell you what or how to feel.
18. Know that there are support groups which can be helpful. If you
can't find a group, ask a professional to help start one.
19. Call on your personal faith to get you through.
20. It is common to experience physical reactions to your grief,
e.g. headaches, loss of appetite, inability to sleep, etc.
21. The willingness to laugh with others and at yourself is healing.
22. Wear out your questions, your anger, your guilt, or other
feelings until you can let them go.
23. Know that you will never be the same again, but you can survive
and go beyond just surviving.
